Welcoming in April: Carmen Avendano, MA, LMFT

Carmen has fifteen years of experience as a Mental Health Professional, twenty-five years of experience as a cross-cultural trainer and over thirty years of experience as a teacher, including the past ten years as an assistant professor for Counseling Psychology, Health and Human Services, and Marriage & Family Therapy graduate programs at St. Mary’s University of Minnesota.

Carmen is passionate about helping her clients achieve their goals and finding effective ways to deal with life’s challenges. It is her goal to help clients heal, achieve their fullest potential, have mutually supportive relationships and improve their overall well being. Carmen offers client centered care and understands the power of diversity, equity, and inclusion. 

Working With your ADHD

Do you often find it difficult to finish something you have started? Is it more difficult for you to “kick into gear” or find the motivation and follow-through that other people seem to conjure up easily? In school, was it more challenging to focus and complete your homework? Do you find yourself lunging into new projects without finishing the ones you had already started? Do you often find yourself restless, bored, and seeking stimulation? 

If you have adult ADHD, struggling with these issues may have led you to feel guilt, shame, and frustration over the course of your life. If only something in your mind would “click” so you could finish the job.  

Here are the facts:

•           ADHD is not just a childhood disorder

•           ADHD does not only present as hyperactivity

•           Very few people outgrow ADHD completely. For most, symptoms remain in adulthood.

While there is no magic cure, working with rather than against the symptoms of ADHD may help. The ADHD mind seeks novelty, excitement, and creativity. Enlisting these motivators can help you reach your goals. Approaching a problem from a novel perspective or seeking new tools can re-invent tedious processes. The next time you feel confined by routine and rigid procedures, consider out-of-the-box solutions to your projects.

Remember that motivation, energy, and focus are different for everyone. When you face a difficult task, you can start by:

•           Accepting your limitations and expanding from there. Too often, we waste mental energy on what we cannot do or haven’t done, leaving little for what we can do now. 

•           Breaking a daunting goal into small, incremental steps while committing to daily action. 

•           Setting realistic and attainable goals. Creating a habit of consistently accomplishing small tasks makes loftier goals more realistic.

•           Entertaining new and creative approaches that capitalize on your unique strengths.  

ADHD is challenging; however, you can become more functional and successful by building on your unique strengths. In time, you can develop new approaches to tackle daily tasks and challenges in ways that work with who you are.  

JOINING US IN AUGUST: SONIA COBOS, MS

Sonia (she/her) is passionate about mental health and behavioral science and considers herself privileged to work in this field.  Sonia recently completed a Master’s degree in rehabilitation and addiction counseling. Her training was focused on addiction and mental health counseling, including the special needs of individuals living with disability, congenital or acquired.

Sonia takes a holistic and goal-oriented Adlerian approach. Informed by this perspective, Sonia believes that the person’s wholeness or holistic nature is irreducible, therefore considering parts of the personality while ignoring others undermines the understanding of the individual. Sonia likes to apply contextual psychology, family system theory, cognitive behavioral therapy, and motivational interviewing in her practice.

As an immigrant, Sonia is mindful of cultural influences as well as the trauma and generational trauma experienced by the immigrant and first and second generation Americans. She approaches multiculturalism as an enriching opportunity to expand our humanity and grow consciousness.

Sonia’s clinical training is patient centered and non-directive. Sonia’s research during graduate school was in neuroplasticity and the promotion of neurogenesis as part of the therapeutic approach for individuals with addictions and co-occurring mental illness.

Sonia enjoys working with individuals of all ages and backgrounds, and has special interest in helping those who experience addictions, domestic violence, developmental trauma, PTSD, grief and traumatic grief, and patients with long-term disability.

Announcing Men's Support Group: Swinging from Birches

We are pleased to announce the beginnings of a new support group, which will be facilitated by Birch Counseling provider Brian Rose, MA, LADC. This group is welcoming men who are facing questions about substance use as well as other pertinent life problems. The group will be held on Monday evenings, 5:00 - 6:30pm at our Hopkins location (904 Mainstreet, #200). If you are interested in becoming a member, please contact our front office at (866) 522-2472, ext. 0. They will be happy to schedule a pre-admission meeting with Brian, who will make sure you are a good fit for the group. This men’s group will be limited to a maximum of 8 active members.

Below is Brian Rose’s description of the group:

The pandemic has been tough. It has broken our connection with many sources of support and the routines that anchored us. This group’s purpose is to connect with other men for support to help answer questions about issues that have arisen in our lives, such as questions about substance use, interpersonal relationships, as well as anxiety and depression. While such issues may have predated the pandemic , the isolation of the lock-downs has made these concerns more visible and pressing for many.

Some of the topics discussed in this group will cover substance use, improving communication in our relationships, repairing connections with friends and family, coping with symptoms of anxiety and depression, and the facing lonliness that has increased with isolation. This will be a process group with a strong focus on learning to connect and trust others.

The group will meet Mondays, from 5:00pm to 6:30pm, in person. 

Birches

Poem by Robert frost

When I see birches bend to left and right
Across the lines of straighter darker trees,
I like to think some boy's been swinging them.
But swinging doesn't bend them down to stay
As ice-storms do. Often you must have seen them
Loaded with ice a sunny winter morning
After a rain. They click upon themselves
As the breeze rises, and turn many-colored
As the stir cracks and crazes their enamel
Soon the sun's warmth makes them shed crystal shells
Shattering and avalanching on the snow-crust —
Such heaps of broken glass to sweep away
You'd think the inner dome of heaven had fallen.
They are dragged to the withered bracken by the load,
And they seem not to break; though once they are bowed
So low for long, they never right themselves:
You may see their trunks arching in the woods
Years afterwards, trailing their leaves on the ground
Like girls on hands and knees that throw their hair
Before them over their heads to dry in the sun.
But I was going to say when Truth broke in
With all her matter-of-fact about the ice-storm
I should prefer to have some boy bend them
As he went out and in to fetch the cows —
Some boy too far from town to learn baseball,
Whose only play was what he found himself,
Summer or winter, and could play alone.
One by one he subdued his father's trees
By riding them down over and over again
Until he took the stiffness out of them,
And not one but hung limp, not one was left
For him to conquer. He learned all there was
To learn about not launching out too soon
And so not carrying the tree away
Clear to the ground. He always kept his poise
To the top branches, climbing carefully
With the same pains you use to fill a cup
Up to the brim, and even above the brim.
Then he flung outward, feet first, with a swish,
Kicking his way down through the air to the ground.
So was I once myself a swinger of birches.
And so I dream of going back to be.
It's when I'm weary of considerations,
And life is too much like a pathless wood
Where your face burns and tickles with the cobwebs
Broken across it, and one eye is weeping
From a twig's having my lashed opened.
I'd like to get away from earth awhile
And then come back to it and begin over.
May no fate willfully misunderstand me
And half grant what I wish and snatch me away
Not to return. Earth's the right place for love:
I don't know where it's likely to go better.
I'd like to go by climbing a birch tree,
And climb black branches up a snow-white trunk
Toward heaven, till the tree could bear no more,
But dipped its top and set me down again.
That would be good both going and coming back.
One could do worse than be a swinger of birches.

Joining us July 1: Laura Linner, MA, LICSW

Laura (she/her) genuinely loves this work and brings authenticity, hope and humor to sessions with individuals and families. She considers it an honor to have the opportunity to walk alongside others in recognizing, accessing, and developing their own resiliency, and in building a rich, full and meaningful life (as they define it!). Laura is mindful of creating a non-judgmental, anti-oppressive, anti-racist, LGBTQIA-affirming space for the clients with whom she works. She views therapy as a collaborative process and values feedback from clients.

Laura’s foundational clinical training is in non-directive Rogerian client-centered therapy from her time as a clinical intern then post-graduate psychotherapy fellow in a group practice in Chicago. This humanistic approach continues to serve as the clinical underpinning of her work with clients. That being said, Laura takes an eclectic approach and aligns with concepts of clinical pragmatism – offering and using what therapeutic intervention works - tailored to each individual. Laura sees therapy as an opportunity to pause, reflect, and take an inventory of how our lives are going, identify what’s working and what isn’t, and make effective change in moving closer to the life we hope for ourselves. Laura brings an attitude of openness, curiosity and compassion with clients. She has benefitted greatly from her own therapy over the years and strives to provide a similarly beneficial experience to those with whom she has the honor of working with.

Laura is trained in, integrates, and draws from a number of therapeutic approaches including Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, trauma-informed therapy (TF-ACT and TF-CBT), CBT for psychosis (CBT-p), ACT for psychosis, psychodynamic theory, polyvagal theory, motivational interviewing, harm-reduction, and also employs a neuroscientific lens to reinforce concepts of regulation, zones of optimal functioning and neuroplasticity/opportunity for growth and change. Laura is also trained in child-centered play therapy from when she worked with youth impacted by domestic violence.

Laura completed her graduate degree in clinical social work at The University of Chicago’s School of Social Service Administration. For the past four years, Laura has worked for the University of Minnesota Department of Psychiatry as an individual and family therapist specializing in first-episode psychosis and schizophrenia spectrum disorders. She has a passion for working with individuals and families in processing new diagnoses and identifying ways of being that work for all who are impacted in their own unique ways. Prior to this, Laura has experience providing therapy and support to individuals in life transitions, relationship challenges, identity exploration and development, finding a sense of meaning and purpose, working through grief and loss, coping with the impact of domestic violence and trauma, and effectively coping with life stressors. She has also worked both internationally and stateside in violence recovery services and human rights work. Diagnostically, Laura has experience working with individuals who have been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, PTSD, OCD, disordered eating, substance use disorders, mood disorders, dissociative disorders, and schizophrenia spectrum disorders.

Laura believes an individual is not their diagnosis, and joins alongside clients to explore meaning of diagnosis in a way that is adaptive and feels authentic to them.

Laura believes life and humans can be messy, confusing, amazing, doubtful, inspired, worried, scared, brave, determined, hopeless, hopeful and many more things all at the same time. Laura is inspired by people’s willingness and ability to move into discomfort, try new ways of being and make change in ways that feel valuable to them, and she is grateful for being able to provide support along the way.

When Laura isn’t working she enjoys reading, spending time with family and friends, snuggling her two cats, needlepointing, watching cooking shows, trying to learn to cook herself, playing outside and learning.

 

 

 

Welcoming in December: Amber Phelps

Amber (they/them) is a Licensed Alcohol and Drug Counselor (LADC) and working toward becoming Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor (LPCC). They are passionate about working with individuals, families, and couples by utilizing harm reduction, trauma-responsive care, and providing culturally affirming therapy to help people embrace recovery from a holistic approach. They are trained in Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) to help survivors of trauma manage symptoms and to assist people to discover their hope from within to achieve their recovery goals. Amber uses a collaborative approach to therapy and is experienced with treating and diagnosing PTSD, depression, anxiety, dissociative disorders, substance use disorders, mood disorders, and schizophrenia spectrum disorders.

They have nearly 10 years of varied experience working with survivors of complex and historical trauma, people experiencing homelessness, substance use treatment, crisis intervention, case management, and community-based harm reduction programs. Amber graduated from St. Mary’s University of Minnesota with a MA in Counseling and Psychological Services and a Graduate Certificate in Addiction Studies. In addition to this, Amber has specialization in working with diverse populations as an intersectional, sex-positive, and social justice oriented therapist.

In their free time, Amber enjoys spending time with their family by hiking, thrift shopping, and going to concerts.

Welcoming in September: Alison Campbell, MSW, LICSW

We are very excited to announce the newest addition to the Birch Counseling Team: Alison Campbell, MSW, LICSW!

Alison enjoys working with both adult individuals and couples across the lifespan from all walks of life. She uses a holistic, mind-body perspective and recognizes that a wide range of past and present influences effect both our individual well being and our relationships. With a collaborative, kind and practical approach, Alison helps people explore patterns that may not be serving them and offers guidance and tools for better coping, balance and resiliency so that they can feel more empowered to make the changes they desire. She uses a strengths based, person centered approach with evidence based practices informed by a blend of frameworks. She has had extensive training in mindfulness and somatic practices.

Alison has experience addressing depression, anxiety, stress reduction, trauma, health issues, substance use, relationship difficulties, grief and loss and personal growth. She has lived on both coasts of the US and has worked with people in a variety of settings including low-come housing, correctional facilities, long term care facilities and hospice and community counseling centers. She received her Master’s degree in Social Work from Washington University in St Louis.

Alison has two children, enjoys good books, good cooking, meeting new people and being in the outdoors. She is also a certified yoga teacher.

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Spotlight with Brian Borre: Metacognitive Therapy

Before we get into theory, or how this approach might apply to you, let’s take a detour into language. When used as a prefix in the English language, “meta-”, stemming from the Greek for “after” or “beyond”, means something that goes beyond, to be all-encompassing, or become transcendent. When “Meta” and “Cognitive” are put together, the result essentially means “thinking about thinking.” For example, have you ever had an experience where you’re certain you know the name of something--a person, product, or place--but you can’t recall it? This “tip of the tongue” experience is just one example of how metacognitions work to inform our everyday lives--we’re thinking about how we’re thinking. While most of our meta-processes aren’t so conscious, our metacognitions are in the background actively controlling and influencing our conscious experience of the world, 

Metacognitive Therapy (MCT) focuses on targeting and modifying our deeply held beliefs--the thinking about our thinking--that fosters states of perpetual worry, rumination, and/or fixation. For example, if you say to yourself, “worrying about this keeps me safe,” or “I have no control over my thoughts,” you are both observing your own thinkingand having thoughts about thinking. The goal of MCT is simple: identify, challenge, and reduce what they dub, “Cognitive-Attentional Syndrome” (CAS). CAS is an umbrella term that refers to the kinds of beliefs that imply: we need worry, are incapable of stopping worry, and would be better off if we hyperfocus on tackling each individual worry.  

You might be thinking to yourself, “Birch Counseling, this is starting to sound a lot like CBT,” (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy). The truth is, you aren’t exactly wrong. In CBT, we are dealing with our thoughts. For example, if we were to use CBT to challenge our social anxiety, we might ask ourselves, “how likely will this outcome be, and will it be as bad as we’re thinking it will be?” Essentially, we identify an irrational thought and we challenge it with a more realistic lens. 

In comparison, with MCT, we are dealing with how we think about our thinking. We don’t give a lot of attention to the individual thoughts. Instead, we challenge the thinking around the thoughts themselves by asking ourselves, “should I spend my time worrying if the worry doesn’t make it less likely to happen? And if I already worried about it and made a decision, why am I re-worrying about this when I don’t have any new information?” This process, which encourages us to refuse to engage with unhelpful thinking, is called “Detached Mindfulness.” It works because it isn’t avoidance--it challenges people to view their worry and irrational beliefs as something that is outside of their core, observe the thoughts, stay non-reactive to them, and choose to respond without the preoccupation with worry about worried thinking. 

Why does Brian like it? Besides being a philosophical guy interested in all things “meta” (emotions, beliefs, and communication), Brian saw that CBT wasn’t always helpful with anxious, depressed, or addiction-driven thinking. From his perspective, it can be equally harmful to hyper-focus on our worry if we feel utterly incapable of controlling or changing it. He thinks about it like “giving in to a screaming toddler you know is just seeking attention because they want something from you, and you don’t know how to handle the upset anymore. Ultimately, it doesn’t help you, or them, to keep caving in or feeling totally helpless to stop it.” Instead, you can learn how to provide the tantruming child in your brain--the anxiety, depression, or addiction monster’s voice--the reassurance that you know what’s best, have a plan, can essentially “pivot” yourself out of the situation, or rebound if you make a mistake. It deflates the tantrum in your brain. And that’s a powerful tool. 

If you think Brian might be a fit for you, or have any additional questions about metacognitive therapy, please feel free to reach out to our team at BizOffice@birchcounseling.com. 

References:

  1. https://mct-institute.co.uk/therapy/

  2. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6246690/#:~:text=Conclusions%3A%20Our%20findings%20indicate%20that,psychotherapies%2C%20including%20cognitive%20behavioral%20interventions.

  3. https://mental-health-matters.com/what-is-metacognitive-therapy-and-how-can-it-help-anxiety/

  4. https://www.frontiersin.org/articles/10.3389/fpsyg.2017.00031/full

Welcoming in May: Brian Rose, MA, LADC

Brian worked as a professional bicycle mechanic for 29 years. This allowed him to travel around the country and connect with people from all over. He enjoys spending time on the bike, meeting people and trying to learn to fly a drone. 

After working in the bicycle industry for so long he found himself working for a non-profit that focused on underserved communities. He  envisioned doing more for people and decided to change careers. His own journey with mental health and recovery lead him down the path to becoming a counselor. He earned his master’s degree in Addiction counseling and advanced practice from Hazelden Betty Ford Graduate School. He received a Bachelor’s in Psychology with a religious studies minor (focused on Islam) from Hamline University. 

Brian believes that his clients are the experts in their own lives. He brings an existential approach to therapy that focuses on meaning, purpose and personal identity. Brian feels his role in the therapeutic relationship is to create an environment where a sense of safety and acceptance allow for openness and collaboration.  Brian enjoys working with clients on topics around culture, identity and helping find where they meet.

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Trade-in Your New Year’s Resolutions for SMARTER Goals This Year

In a normal year, January would be our starting-point for identifying all the changes we want to make in the next 12 months. But this isn’t a normal year, and as a means of coping with the uncertainty and disappointments of 2020, many of us started making our resolution list a little early this year. Birthdays, holidays, and traditions only feel remotely tolerable right now because we are promising ourselves that we will have more memorable ones next year. Similar to promising ourselves we would use that gym membership more, or spend less, or whatever resolution you tend towards, we often find ourselves at great (or even guaranteed) risk of disappointment. 

Part of why this happens is because humans have a predisposition towards thinking errors, also known as cognitive distortions, which cause us to struggle to identify what is realistic. One of the hardest cognitive distortions to overcome is referred to as magical thinking, and it can frequently be found masquerading as its healthier counterpart, positive thinking. These two are difficult to distinguish from each other because, fundamentally, they are not all that different. Each side wants things to be better, require belief that all parts involved have the capacity to change, and both can contribute to an optimistic outlook on the horizon. We need to have faith things can be different, and that we can feel different, perhaps now more than ever. 

Where positive, or magical, thinking tips over into unhealthy territory is when we set expectations that are impossible to achieve, unintentionally keeping us stuck in unhealthy patterns. When we set these kinds of expectations for ourselves, others, or institutions, we are engaging in what the 12-step community commonly refers to as “premeditated resentments.” We end up building logs of evidence, expectations and failures, compounding hurt and disappointment, increasing our pressure and avoidance of the behaviors needed to succeed. It is, in short, a set-up-to-fail. And no one needs any unnecessary hardship next year. Luckily, there is a better way, and you don’t need therapy to do it. 

Some of you might be familiar with SMART goals, which stands for: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Timely. Therapists often use this acronym when setting goals and objectives for client treatment plans. If increasing health is a goal, we ask you specifically what you mean by that—how would you measure your success? Is it achievable for you in your given context and circumstance? Do you have evidence you have the capacity to do it at the level you are setting out for, or should we lower the bar just a bit to help you gain your confidence? Every few months, we check back in about these goals and revise them based on how you have been doing, not what you thought you would be capable of. Missed a day of exercise because you were sick? Sure! Missed a day of exercise because you skipped Monday and so the whole week is basically a moot point? We can work on that! 

However, at home, we encourage the SMARTER approach, adding: Expectations and Rigidity to the mix. Ensure that you are expecting some setbacks and failures along the way, and that your expectations aren’t outside of your control (like wanting a parent or partner to change). Assess if your goals are too rigid (it can only happen in this way at these times in this way), or are too weak under external fluctuations (like needing to move or a job change). Through taking the SMARTER approach, you can mitigate the risks of over-relying on positive thinking, let go of thinking errors and thoughts about how things “should be”, and cultivate the resilience and mental flexibility to make the most out of how things actually are. This should allow you to work smarter, not harder, on all the ways you’ll make 2021 the best it can be. 

Wishing you all a Happier, Healthier, and SMARTER 2021!

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The Winter is Coming: Managing Mental Health Outside of Therapy

Those ominous words from Game of Thrones have taken on totally new (and dare we say intensified) meaning to Minnesotans this year. In an average year, the National Institute on Mental Health reports that Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) impacts millions of Americans annually, lasts 40% of the year, and disproportionately impacts people living in the Northern parts of the country. This year, compounded by the pandemic, people who study and suffer from mental health are expecting this winter to be one of the worst on record. And similar to how hospital beds fill up with patients when there’s a virus outbreak, therapists have started filling up as we start to deal with the first wave of the mental health crisis. 

 So what do you do if you need to supplement therapy, can’t find a therapist, or don’t have the resources to get regular mental health care? We’ve got some tips to help you fight the good fight at home. 

  1. Try An App or Two

  2. Offline Solutions

    • Workbooks: There are so many, it’s hard to know where to start! You can find one based on an issue (anxiety, depression, self-esteem) or pick based on a particular approach that appeals to you (ACT, CBT, DBT). Whichever you choose, these can be great ways to increase insight, coping, and positive change.

    • SAD Lamp: Sure, it may seem silly, but these powerful lamps help you get your daily dose of sunshine, even on the most cloudy of days.

    • Body Maintenance: We all know to eat right, exercise, and take care of our bodies, and try to do it when we have the time and energy to. When we aren't attuned to our bodies, it can be easy to ignore or explain things away that actually might have an organic cause. Going to your doctor and making sure your vitamin levels are at their levels and that we have optimized what we have control over can be empowering. If you think it's needed or appropriate, talk to them about your mood and if any if there are any solutions, natural or pharmaceutical, that might be appropriate. We do maintenance updates on our phones and cars... we might as well do it for ourselves, too.

  3. Done Everything? Try Alternative Solutions:

    • Healing crystals: Change up the energy in your life and ground yourself with some stones

    • Try something natural: Harvard Medical School found some benefits to things like St. John's Wort and Omega-3 Fats for mental health.

    • Try a homeopathic solution: Acupuncture, Massage, and Aroma Therapy might not feel as legitimate, but their benefits have been well researched and studied. If you've tried everything else, it might be worth a new approach.

  4. Get Fancy (When/If Appropriate)

    • Meditate, with training wheels: Use a brain-sensing headband and app combination, like Muse, to give you bio-feedback on how you're doing on your practice of daily meditation.

    • Get your frequency right: Brain stimulators, like Fisher Wallace, can be helpful in treating and managing chronic issues of insomnia, depression, and anxiety.

    • Get your rhythm right: HearMath is a program to get your heart and your brain in sync.

Still unsure about how you're going to make it through the winter, give us a call or email us and we'll be happy to connect you to the right resources for you!

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What Trauma Looks Likes →

In this powerful short film from producers Nathanael Matanick and Christina Matanick, we witness the impact of domestic violence on a young girl.  The consequences of her caregivers’ violence are far-reaching.  The girl's world is shattered, her family breaks apart, and her life is turned up-side-down.   

This is trauma.

This film shows graphically how trauma fragments the world outside.  But it also depicts how the world within is injured.  Trauma undermines self-esteem and erodes trust,  setting the stage for difficulties ahead.

As difficult as it is to watch,  the film illuminates the core elements of trauma.  It offers a starting place for understanding, repair, and hope.

Stress in a Stressful Time

Even if your life before this year was relatively smooth sailing, likely, you are not making it through this year unscathed. After all, who could mentally prepared for civil unrest, unemployment, natural disasters, and a global pandemic all at once?

The dramatic events of 2020 are especially difficult for those with a trauma history. People with trauma include those whose past is marked by economic insecurity, frequent moving, homelessness, food insecurity, sudden or unexpected loss, or medical trauma.

Trauma survivors typically develop an “Early Warning System,” alerting against perceived danger. For example, suppose your parents fought a lot when you were a child. In that case, you are likely to be especially sensitive to tension, conflict, or discord around you. This additional sensitivity offers insight as to why today’s upheavals are incredibly stressful for trauma survivors.

 If this sounds like you or someone you know, what can you do?

Become fully aware of your feelings and name them.

If you’re watching the news at home and feel panic starting to flood your system, become consciously aware of your reactions. After acknowledging your feelings, recall that you have heightened sensitivity to current events because of your past traumas. Try watching the feelings as, in most cases, they will fade in time. Also, this is an excellent time to change your environment, like going for a walk.

Use your support system.

By putting your truth on the table with someone you trust and acknowledging the impact it’s having on you, you’re gaining control over the uncontrollable. You’re also modeling to others that it’s okay for them to share with you. If you have a limited support system, it might help do some resourcing online or in therapy.

Self-care is important.

Stretching, yoga, journaling, meditation, cooking, or watching comedy can help you feel safe and present. Taking good care of ourselves requires making your needs a priority. As we take better care of ourselves, we will show up as a better partner, parent, worker, and friend.  

If what helps you happens to be watching puppy videos on Instagram, please tag us so we can also enjoy a little puppy Prozac!

Be kind to yourself.

The world was stressful before 2020, and it certainly doesn’t seem to be winding down any time soon. Allow yourself to feel sad, scared, stressed, exhausted—whatever comes up. Give yourself time to acknowledge and validate these feelings. You may find it helpful to acknowledge at least one positive for every negative thing you noticed.Are you struggling to go back into the office? Remember that you now have half the traffic you used to  Struggling trusting yourself? Remember, it’s okay to not feel like the authority after your entire world has changed. Ask someone you trust what their honest evaluation is of the situation.

Making small adjustments like this work to help you to keep you in balance.

If there was ever an appropriate time to feel a little crazy, this is it. If you find that your internal alarms are going off an awful lot lately, remember you are hardly alone, and at least you know your system is working! Finally, if you are struggling to turn them off, we are happy to connect you with help. Feel free to call us at 866-522-2472 or drop us a line at bizoffice@birchcounseling.com.  


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THRIVING DURING SOCIAL ISOLATION

Of all the adjustments we need to make during the COVID-19 pandemic perhaps the most challenging is learning to live with social isolation.  In this post I am sharing a link which features undoubtably an expert in social isolation, astronaut Chris Hadfield, who has spent many months on the International Space Station.  Hadfield encourages embracing these challenging times including enjoying the slower pace and perhaps learning something new.

Hadfield also points out that living on the International Space Station, like living through a pandemic, involves being isolated in a high-risk environment.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uL5sqe5Uk8&feature=youtu.be

Hadfield offers the following key points:

Know the Risks.  Hadfield recommends that we go to a reliable source to understand “what is truly the risk you are facing.”  This clarity will help you stay balanced and “not be afraid of everything.”

Create Clear Goals.  Hadfield says it is important to set goals for the next day, next week, and month.  Goals give structure to your life.

Acknowledge your Constrains. Who is telling you what you need to do?  What financial resources do you have? What are your obligations?

Take Action. Once you are informed on actual risks and you have set your goals keeping in mind realistic constraints, take action.  Aside from taking care of your family and yourself, Hadfield suggest that you can try things you have never done before.  He points out that with the Internet and all that it allows access to “there is never been a better time to self-isolate.”

Sourced from:

Hadfield, C. (2020, March 21). An Astronaut's Guide to Self Isolation. Retrieved March 22, 2020, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uL5sqe5Uk8&feature=youtu.be

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Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4uL5sqe5Uk...

Accepting what is versus chasing happy

Somewhere, somehow most of us have learned that a happy life means never having to feel anything other than positive emotions.  When sadness visits, or anger, or disappointment, it feels sick, like something is wrong with us. It feels as though we are not enough, our lives are not enough.  We try to distract from negatives and chase happy feelings, only to fall short again and again.

What if we could learn to work with these “negative” feelings in a way that better informs us?  Accepting and being curious about the entire range of our emotions can help us become more compassionate, healthy and ultimately more resilient.  

Breaking news: Office Canine Willow loses mind over SNOW

As you all know, we had our first big snow of the season and Willow LOVED it. How can we tell? Uh, she ran through the white stuff in circles, jumped into the big piles…also ate it. She turns nine months on Dec. 6th and already weighs in at over 60 lbs. Willow will be sharing Thanksgiving with her parents and delight in snow as well as baked sweet potato treats. Feel free to ask our Office Manager Hannah for the recipe. Make sure to stop by Hannah’s desk in Golden Valley, say ‘hi’ to Willow (caution: expect to be showered with affection) and let her show off her favorite tattered toy.

As for recent accomplishments: Willow graduated from intermediate obedience and begins advanced training in January. She will then be able to take the Canine Good Citizenship test and begin therapy dog training. Yay, Willow!